16.8 Million

A few days ago, the 2009 Erin Andrews nude video case resurfaced in the news as she took the stand to testify. The end result of that case is that Andrews was awarded 55 million in damages against the hotel that failed to notify her of a an obsessed "fan" who requested the room beside her and subsequently recorded her naked through a peephole.

We can debate whether or not she deserves 55 million for days (but the answer is yes, fyi.  The answer is yes because she will never get to be the same person she was before someone compromised her sense of safety and freedom by using her own body against her. But the question here is not, in my mind, "Will 55 million alleviate the suffering that Andrews has and will continue to endure?"  Because the answer is no.  Now she simply is a victim who is 55 million richer, but no less afraid.  The question here is, "How much effing money do we have to take away from someone to get people to stop doing this sort of shit to women?"  And if the answer is 55 million, so be it.  Because people apparently don't have the sort of conscience that would help them come to that conclusion on their own, we have to get their attention with something they do care about more than basic human decency.

The settlement is a huge victory, obviously, but the unintended consequence of the victory is that she is now once again in the spotlight and, as this article details, the video is once again trending on Google search.  So basically, she's reliving the entire thing.

I understand curiosity.  There is something to seeing something for yourself.  A few years back, when the video of Ray Rice hitting his fiance was released on the internet, I watched it, then instantly felt disgusting for having done so.  What is to gain from such a thing, other than voyeurism, or some sort of weird shadenfreude? Nothing, but that curiosity is like everyone crowding around when someone fought in the hall in high school- you want to see it.

I am not immune to curiosity either.  But, in this situation, I am begging you, don't.
Don't Google it, don't watch it, don't look for stills.  Nothing.

Please recognize videos like this for exactly what they are, which is a method of shaming and holding down women who hold any sort of power.  There's a name for it- blackmail porn- and it's effing illegal.  Videos like this are inherently misogynistic. We live in a society where women have to fight an uphill battle to be taken seriously. She's a sports reporter! A female sports reporter- can you even imagine all the bullshit she had to put up with to get there?

And when a woman- Erin Andrews, or Jennifer Lawrence and any of the other celebrities who had nude photos leaked last year- gets too powerful, they put her in check by reducing her to a body, an object.

This is not just about an obsessed "fan".  If it was, why would he sell the video?  It's about holding someone down, dominating and controlling them,

It's news to exactly no one that the internet is full of all sorts of porn, and I've really got nothing to say about that one way or the other.  Watch it, don't watch it- you're an adult, I leave it to you.  But there's a very big difference between porn and the Erin Andrews video, and that is that the the vast majority of porn is (hopefully) consensual, which is to say that the people involved have CHOSEN to be involved, have set the parameters for what they will or will not do, and have (hopefully) been compensated in a way that makes it worthwhile to them. And that's their choice, but the operative word is choice.

If you are watching the Erin Andrews video, you are not watching porn, you are watching an assault.  Women CAN participate in porn- and SHOULD be allowed to do so, sans slut-shaming- as long as they maintain agency over themselves.  Erin Andrews had none of that, and that's why you shouldn't have anything to do with the video.

The fact that you didn't make the video, didn't distribute the video, didn't have a hand in whatever went into getting it out in the world does not mean that you are not complicit when you watch it.  Only one person made the video, but 16.8 million people watched it.  The video was made famous by the watchers, not the guy who made it.  Guys, even TMZ wouldn't buy the damn video.  If you find that TMZ has greater moral compass than you, it is time to revisit your morals.

We decry the breakdown of society, the bad morals, the horrible things that are going on, and then we each take part in it, claiming that "it's already out there".  Guess what? 1+1+1 eventually equals 16.8 million if you go long enough.  And every single "1" claimed it wasn't their fault.

If you want to know something about the case- instead of googling some creepy video that a misogynistic psycho took through a peephole, maybe instead you could watch this video, in which she describes how she feels she can't be the same person for the man she loves because of the video.  Or maybe watch her father on the stand, talking about how she isn't the same person.  Yeah, that's someone's daughter.

It isn't adult entertainment.  If we're going to talk about making things better for women in this country, then 16.8 million of us need to stop being 1 of 16.8 million.  And if we're not worried about how we're treating the women in this society, then we have a much, much bigger problem that is, frankly, too depressing to even consider.